18 July 2007

The Daily Nous, July 17, 2007

NFL STAR INVESTIGATED IN BIZARRE DOG FIGHTING RING


















(CNN) -- NFL quarterback Michael Vick, recently indicted on federal charges for his participation in a dog fighting ring at his home in Virginia, is now under investigation for an alleged earlier dog fighting ring that had a bizarre twist. Incredibly, Vick was actually inside the ring fighting the dogs himself.

Vick isn’t contesting the charges. He has been open and cooperative with law officials and the press about his involvement since the charges surfaced. “I figured, hey, things can’t get much worse than they already are. Maybe this cooperation will buy me some leniency when I’m being sentenced.” On that note, PETA released a statement on their website early Thursday, decrying Vick’s actions and pledging to see that he receives the maximum sentence for his actions. This official statement points out that "the one thing worse than training animals to inflict harm on each other for our entertainment is inflicting harm upon them ourselves for our entertainment."

In reply to PETA, Vick was reported to have said, “I’m really sorry. If I had known that I was supposed to just let the dogs fight each other, I would’ve been doing that this whole time. I mean, as soon as I did find out, I made the switch immediately. Believe me, it would’ve been a whole lot easier if I’d known from the beginning. I missed so many practices because of lacerations and puncture wounds on my hands—I had the team doctors breathing down my neck the whole time.”

“Some of those pit bulls are mean machines,” said Vick. “Worse than any linebacker I’ve ever met.”

2 comments:

Russell said...

Do you think of some gods in Greek and some in Latin? I do. I was thinking about this the other day. To me, the father of the gods is always Zeus, never Jupiter. Yet Mars is the god of war, not Ares. And I never think of Juno when I am thinking of Zeus' wife, Hera. But then, Venus is more the goddess of love and lovers than Aphrodite (who in my mind was always more interested in selfish love involving her own relationships more than others'). Poor Mercury though, I hardly associate him with Hermes at all. and on the flip-side, who ever invokes Artemis when they're hoping for a baby? Nobody, that's who We're all calling on Diana.

Mer said...

Daniel,
You are so good at updating your blog. Tell your wife to get busy! I miss her blog. I also find your pet/animal fixation quite intriguing...Are you guys in Canada now?